Dating, Parties and Taking the Transition Train to College

The #1 Global community for college women asked me to chime-in on college romance again! I love the Her Campus Magazine! Please enjoy the article by Abigail Miller with major insight from college students that have seriously contemplated the subject of; breaking off a long-term relationship before embarking on the track to college.

While I conducted my research last month, I especially enjoyed talking with med-school students input on this subject (below). The students were wise, dedicated to their studies, fun and serious about having a well-rounded college experience; parties and all. Since they all had different views to share they painted a colorful picture of the college freshman year.

To break-up or not to break-up… that is the quandary:

Your heart is racing as you walk down the collegiate halls on your way to your first-choice college class but you skillfully play it aloof. You take your seat then your eyes and mind skim past your brilliant, award-winning published professor so you can focus on the lonely bird chirping at the window while you miss the entire lecture. The professor calls your name the moment you realize your head was in the bird-filled-clouds all because you followed everyone’s well meaning but also reckless advice by breaking up with your SO (significant other)-the other side of your heart, before you started college. Maybe you should have broken up, but maybe not; advance serious research pondering of Ivy League love relationship decisions could allow student’s smoother transitions into a successful and enjoyable college life.

Over ninety-percent of people I polled believe college students will have a richer higher-education experience if they remain single throughout their college education. College students in committed off-campus relationships are known to not attend dances, outings or events on dates or with groups of friends, because their SO might get jealous, reports their college single friends. These one-half-of-a-couple students say they do not want to hurt their SO’s feelings, start gossip or lead anyone on, so they stay home and miss the “later to be exaggerated and cherished memories” everyone hopes to earn while pursuing their final diplomas. Other students say they are creating wonderful memories while in a relationship with an SO “back home”. I have also spoken to college graduates with wishes to go back in time to marry the high school sweetheart they let get away before college. This latest research shows the answer for breaking up with your high school SO before going to college is not simple, but it can evolve into simplicity:

If you cannot wait to start your Freshman year without any ties to your high school SO the breakup answer is easy, but make sure you depart in the kindest of ways for many, many reasons including the golden, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” rule.

If you are on your way to your Freshman year in college and the first person you want to call about every accomplishment, surprise and hilarious embarrassment is your SO it’s not time to cut the ties or break your own heart. Most of those polled say students don’t need to add a breakup to their school changes before they leave for college because students will probably mutually break up with their high school SO “after” they go away to college where they experience the difficulties and inconveniences that could arise for those in committed relationships. This type of delayed shared breakup is much easier on the heart, head and the mandatory freshman college attention span, so stop the breakup decision rush, relax, keep your SO communication open and let things happen as naturally as possible. If you are in the less than two-percent and graduated college in an “absence-made-the-heart-grow-fonder” couple, happily married to your high school sweetheart, Congratulations! Especially if you evaded wild social media relationship-challenge horrors and have couple-selfies of the college dances and events you attended together! -Rhonda Ricardo, Author Cherries Over Quicksand, columnist, screenwriter and speaker.