When is Silent Sexy?

December 15, 2010

Does your man come home, sit on the couch and stare at the television with his mouth open and finger in his ear or bellybutton?  Oops! Sorry if that image was too close to home.  Can your man sit through a meal and not hear a word of conversation around his head?  Guess what?…That’s completely normal.  He’s relaxed and feels safe and happy at home so why not enjoy his meal and zone out a little?  He’s probably had a hard day, so as long as he compliments the chef or helps with the dishes he figures everything is just perfect.

Then a new movie starts on television with a strong Clint Eastwood silent type and your man seems to really enjoy the character, and so do you!  So what’s the difference between Clint being silent and Happy Husband/Boyfriend being quiet?  It’s all in the technique, and not impossible for the everyday man to duplicate if he really wants to try.

Tom Selleck, Antonio Bandares, Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp have all played the silent type and the ladies fell in big love with them so why do we complain when our men are quiet?  I’ve done a little research and found that it is all in the attitude!

Tom Selleck has a silent humor about him that makes him delicious in just about every movie where he plays the slightly confused but confident guy like in Three Men and a Baby.  It is difficult for the leading lady not to want to rescue him while she is letting him rescue her too!  His face and eyebrows can say volumes and create weak knees with no words.

There is Johnny Depp’s silent, like in Chocolat, Benny and Joon  and What’s Eating Gilbert Grape where he can speak to his leading lady with his eyes, deliberately not answer her with words and make her swoon… not make her angry.

Antonio Bandares in Desperado and The Mask of Zorro talked to his leading ladies with his body.  Hey that man can strike a pose and it is nowhere near feminine!   Are there unsexy ways a man could use his posture to turn his woman off?  Oh yah!   If men could strike that balance of ‘I’m barley containing my manliness’ and  Bandares’, ‘You are the only woman for me’ stance, men would be way too powerful, but as long as they use it for good, I’m all for it!

When Brad Pitt talks it seems everyone listens but when he played Tristan in Legends of the Fall it was his masculine energy that commanded every scene, and that was okay with the ladies because it was more of a sensual presence not an angry or egotistical energy.   If his stare came in a spray can, the world would be filled with smiles!

I have met men who do not look anything like these movie stars but still bring all these strong silent talents into the house and others who leave their camping catalog on the floor in the bathroom so they can easily get back to reading where they left off; not sexy.   Men say they love physical attention.  Have they had the power to get what they want by watching these leading men and just changing their demeanor from slug to home run but just not try?

Why do men do the silent-thing but not use the masculine allure (attitude) we would all love in our lives?   Is there anything women can do to get their guys back on the flirt/romance track?  Also, how can guys show their ladies they will be onboard if she gets back on the flirt/romance track?

The reaction to a photo of Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry together is not unlike the response to a Renoir painting or Valentino gown, there is an involuntary three-second intake of breath as the beauty is fully absorbed. What do we really know about this alluring couple? We know they have acknowledged they intend to proceed with the split amicably and are keeping their two-year-old daughter Nahla’s wellbeing a healthy priority. We also know Halle is 9 years older than Aubry…so what?!

There is an important and HUGE story here that women of all ages can take from this break-up. Why does Halle look so radiant?!

It is amazing when a woman going through a heart-wrenching break-up can continue to keep her glow. Especially, when she can’t help but run confusing and often painful questions about the father of her child, once the absolute love of her life, through her head. How does she keep her head up, not go through gallons of ice cream, boxes of brownie mix or gallons of dirty martinis?

Besides her amazing love for her little girl, Halle has a secret inner beauty that women in the midst of relationship chaos can emulate to get the same glow…and mothers around the world can explain to their daughters so they too, can find their own strength in tough times.

There is a reason her inner beauty comes through when she is playing roles that do not highlight her glamour, it is called caring-confidence…and during my years of researching what men really think… the secret to being the sexiest of women (out of a three page list of some other powerful answers), is to share the special caring-confidence that he can see when she is helping others…because he knows (or hopes) she will share her special power with him! I have heard the response to this “alluring radiance in hard times” question so many times I dedicated an entire chapter in my book.

Last Saturday, May 1, Halle co-hosted the 13th Annual EIF/Revlon Run/Walk for Women in Times Square. She was joined by Revlon Brand Ambassadors Jessica Biel and Jessica Alba who were also shining. In a video at the May 1 event on Access Hollywood’s website Halle looks radiant as she said, “I am blessed to have a voice in the world and I think it is important to use the gifts we are given to help others.” She also goes on to say she has been an Ambassador for Revlon for over a decade and less than two weeks prior CelebrityGossip.net has fabulous photos and a story about Halle lending her support to the 30th Anniversary Silver Rose Gala and Auction to help victims of domestic violence… that’s two HUGE fundraisers in less than a month…and her compassion always shines while helping those in need!

 Working on a fundraiser will inevitably make you have to choose between other fun or work projects… and completing your dedication to the cause at hand will never go unnoticed. When a woman keeps her focus on reaching her goals, like getting victorious results for those in need, the truth is revealed… she’s hot!

Will there be a new romance in Halle’s future? Well let’s see…the intense inner beauty she has developed is like a gigantic-man-magnet and her dedication to keeping her outer beauty smokin’ at the same time continues, so I would guess that if the right and deserving man comes along (or comes/is asked back) she could be wrapped in man-muscle with a simple flex of her pretty biceps. Since imitation is the sincerest form of flattery…could many women set out on a new adventure (in volunteerism) to follow Halle’s beautifully manicured footsteps to radiant-magnetism? I think I will try that super-power on today!

Cover story for Citiview

April 21, 2010

4/20/2010… Just received a copy of Central Iowa’s Newsweekly City View Magazine with the Cherries Over Quicksand as the cover story!  It is fabulous!!  Thank you writer Matt Miller!  See the online version here.

4/20/2010… Had a blast today on the Southern California Life KZSW and KVMD TV show with beautiful host Allie Myers talking about Cherries Over QuicksandNews Net is Dedicated to Providing Local, Regional & National News Pertinent to the Inland Empire and Southern California.

Just found out Luxury Beauty Products has recommended Cherries Over Quicksand as a “must-read, Summer beach read”!!   Thank you for your support and great compliments Missy!  Visit her blog to read about her new favorites: cosmetics, clothes, shopping and everyday fun things: http://luxurybeautyproducts.blogspot.com/ .  She will surprise you with great new finds!

4/19/2010… A Press Release from the Art Institute of Colorado about my daughter and book cover designer, Sandra Poortinga was just published on Denver’s yourhub.com for her work in designing my Cherries Over Quicksand book cover (and for being a 4.0 student, Smile).  She rocks!  Yea!

4/19/2010… Setting up my first book signing at a California Starbucks location, hopefully we can successfully pair Cherries Over Quicksand with their delicious new coffee drink Dark Cherry Mocha…Yum!  Stay tuned for date & time.

Murrieta Bookshop

April 19, 2010

4/14/2010… Met with Murrieta Bookshop’s marketing manager to set up a book signing in May, they will be displaying a large poster of the Cherries Over Quicksand book cover in their entry. 😀 It’s a wonderful book store, with a fabulous book selection!  They are planning a fun festival next month!

Inspiration Gala

April 19, 2010

4/11/2010… Covering the Hospice of the Valleys Scott Crane Inspiration Gala at Wilson Creek Winery for The Californian/North County Times Social Scene.  Scott’s five values he hel true:  Honesty, Respect, Humanity, Integrity and Advocacy…looking forward to this evening!

4/10/2010… Covering the Red Carpet Event Fashion Show & Luncheon presented by the Assistance League of Temecula Valley at Wilson Creek Winery in Temecula for The Californian/North County Times Social Scene.  The event will benefit Operation School Bell for underprivileged children in need of school clothes, Kids on the Block , Project Smile helping children in need with dental care; HOPE services for victims of domestic violence and more!  To read the published article about this event, click here.